Thread: Just Broken
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Old Jul 03, 2013, 11:55 AM
hamster-bamster hamster-bamster is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LostButFound View Post
I can't imagine what it must be like to be forced to choose between your new wife and your firstborn son. I'm not the one making him choose. That's on them.

...

The reality is, I can't make him the father he used to be or the father he swore he would always be.
You are absolutely right. The choice is on them. All you are doing is:

- declining to acquiesce to his taking a step that you know is not right - neither for him, nor for the son

- declining to participate in their attempts to create an illusion; whatever feeds their desire to create an illusion - her insecurity or his or both - they have that desire, and you have your right to decline parcipation

That is all you are doing and all you can do - you cannot force him to father the son the way he should, but you can decline to participate in what you know is not right. So your sense of personal boundaries is actually perfect.

Quote:
Originally Posted by LostButFound View Post
Thankfully, I'm going camping for the weekend. I can turn the cell off and forget the stress.
Oh great! And breathe in real fresh air! Enjoy!

Quote:
Originally Posted by LostButFound View Post
To answer other poster's questions: yes, I love my husband. I was intensely loyal to my ex husband though... So many days, I feel like having a new life is like cheating on him. Warped, no doubt.
It is, admittedly, a little warped, but no more warped than most of human thinking and emotion. I am just delighted that you realize that that is what you are feeling (as spondiferous said above, your level of self-awareness is astonishingly high) and trust that such a high level of insight will help you through difficult times.
Thanks for this!
LostButFound