How old are all of the people in this movie?

(sorry, not trying to make light of it, but sometimes if you separate yourself from the situation like an outsider looking in, like it is a movie, you can give the main character (yourself) the advice he needs to hear.)

This guy seems like his intentions are good, but it sounds like he is getting a sadistic pleasure out of being the white knight, as you say.

Reminds me of the movie "Indecent Proposal". She really did start to fall for the other guy. But never "officially", until the husband created his own demise through his jealousy. But his jealousy was just the excuse she needed. She was developing the feelings, don't be fooled. I like the previous posters "pregnant moments" analogy.

Pick up Artists call them "sparks". They go around the bar throwing sparks on all these girls and then take the most willing girl home with them at the end of the night. 25% recognize him as a player and a jerk. 25% recognize him as a player, but love the feeling anyway, play along, but would never go home with him. 35% don't recognize that he is a player, and they eat it up, but would still never go home with him, even after two dates, and then don't understand why he doesn't call. And 15% fall for it hook line and sinker and end up sleeping with the guy.

This guy is not as malicious as that, but he is definitely creating a co-dependent relationship with her that is churning up her emotional attachment. She will deny that to her grave, because nothing has ever "happened". But like the last poster said, those "pregnant moments" are like seeds, planted. Maybe they will sprout, maybe not.

Another good movie for you is Silver Linings Playbook. If you were the guy in that movie, during his previous marriage prequel, you might consider doing what he did (although in the movie, it wasn't his choice). Get out of the relationship, get your life together, and then be a white knight for some future lady that you haven't yet met. It worked well for him. He did all this work to win his wife back from the white knight, but in so doing, he became the white night for Jennifer Lawrence.

If you can't be the white knight now, but you are fighting for love against a white knight, you may just be ignoring the reality. DO what you need to do to BECOME a white knight. Not for her, but for you.

In my opinion.