Perhaps it's my mood, perhaps it's my own personal experience, perhaps it's my own sense of guilt lingering, perhaps I am misunderstanding you or maybe I'm projecting. But that is a very silly statement.

It seems to me that haunted is having a difficult time assessing his wife's stressors and he's been married to her for 15 years, how can you make a blanket statement like that? Just because it looks perfect from the outside, doesn't mean there isn't something that is eating away at her day after day. Or that her feelings are not valid.

Most people look at my life and say I have the perfect husband. And he is in many ways. I've come to the conclusion there isn't another man on the planet that would be better suited for me. He spoils me rotten. He does most of the cooking, at least half of the cleaning and waits on me hand and foot. The desires of the children and I come before his own needs. He is intelligent and successful. He is devoted to us. However, it does not come without struggle! Without the tools to deal with these issues, they can and have destroyed our relationship.

I have to be very careful about what I say. A comment said without thinking on a commercial will have that product showing up in our house. If I get frustrated because my phone is on the blink, I'll come home and find a new phone. He will make these purchases in an effort to make me happy, even though he knows that material things mean nothing to me. In the meantime I have to worry. Did he go out and spend $800 on a new phone I do not need and put off paying the property taxes? I have to demand receipts to make sure the bills are paid. He will fight tooth and nail to spend money on underwear for himself, but my daughter mentions a coach bag and it appears. On the rare occasion that he buys something frivolous for himself, everyone else has to get something that we do not need or want. He wanted to buy himself a new car. He works hard, we can afford it, go for it. But a week before his car was delivered I came home and had a new van sitting in my driveway. All because I mentioned (without thinking!) that our previous vehicle had more luggage space. He did it out of love, I know he did but every time I get into that van I see money that is not going into our savings account to build a cushion for his next financial disaster.

I know that these issues stem from his childhood. I try to be patient and understanding. BUT I still have to worry and fret every single day. It wears you down to guard every comment that comes out of your mouth. It's stressful every month to go over the bills. Did he really lose that receipt or is it not paid? It's embarrassing to call the bank and make sure that he made a transfer. We make a very comfortable living but he makes stupid financial decisions that end up costing us 4 times what they should have.