I know the feeling. when I was first diagnosed I watched every movie on the subject I could find, read every book and would tell my therapist but I dont ....feell...DID.

my therapist would say ok so what does DID feel like..and I would say well this movie says it feels this way and that book says it feels that way. my therapist laughed and said no Im not talking about that glorified crap. Im talking about ....you. how does DID feel in you. I said I dont know, I feel the same as I have always felt. my depression has kicked in so Im feeling a bit down but thats better then being manic, tired from work and school, I dont know whats your point, you always have a point lol .

she said there is no one way to feel DID just like there is no one way to feel having a cold, or depression or anything else. the symptoms/problems are going to be coming and going according to all kinds of factors in your life...do you always feel suicidal when you are depressed?

my answer...no sometimes I just feel heavy, sad, other times I feel suicidal, sometimes I feel like I cant get motivated other times I dont feel that way.

my therapist said exactly. you are not going to always be able to hear your alters, you are not always going to know when they have been around and when they havent.

Just trust yourself or should I say your internal system of alters. whether you knew it or not you have been DID all your life and here you are. that in itself is a testament to your alters abilities to do what they have been created to do. so things are quiet right now, enjoy the peace/quiet/tranquility/stability while it lasts. When things pick up again we will know what to do next.

I went through many mood swings where I didnt ....Feel....DID and many more when I did feel my dissociative symptoms. over all I just followed my treatment providers advice and everything worked out.

my suggestion trust your internal system to be doing what ever they were created to do. they have gotten you this far they will continue. my next suggestion is we cant tell you what to do, whether you should go look for them or not...only your treatment providers can tell you how best to approach this problem. so consider contacting your treatment providers and filling them in on your thoughts.