Hi Angela -- I am complete klutz about managing relationships, so I hate to make suggestions. On the other hand, I teach communication, and I've made some progress in asserting my boundaries.

Here are some things that have helped me to manage situations I dislike a bit more effectively:

The words "uncomfortable" and "inappropriate" are your friends.

"I feel uncomfortable when you tell me so much about your personal life. It's not appropriate for our business relationship."

"I feel uncomfortable when you want to talk during my work time."

"Talking about our coworkers is not appropriate."

I also was wondering if you could schedule in times when you are working -- perhaps leaving a sign on your door as a reminder -- and schedule a brief, daily time when she can unburden herself to you in your office, which is your power domain. No more conferences out back because "I'm uncomfortable when we conduct these meetings in a social area. Perhaps you could wait until our daily meeting at 2 p.m. to fill me in about this."

I might mention that some people consider me a bit cold and aloof, so my style definitely is not for everyone.