ah. gotcha. thx for clarification as it makes sense. we often are frustrated or confused when we ask for specifics in support and feel jumped on when others suggest we accept all support given as beggars can't be choosers.

as for us and our abuses and abusers? we didn't choose them. for now we'd like to choose our support when we're able to explicitly express a wish for certain kinds of support as that helps empower us in feeling HEARD and listened to and validated. all things lacking during years of abuse and dissociative ways of coping.

making sense? we're not trying to shove off those who care but sometimes caring isn't enough in what we seek.....another thread somewhere is similar with watching what we post....if support or advice and looking at whether or not either was asked for. ramble.....today is a sickie day. wishing meds were leveling out instead of still readjusting and leaving us whacko w/ feeling ick sick and bleck.