Quote:
Originally Posted by Beatzen
I'm stuck in a prison of self-doubt, shame, needing, and wanting. I've barely slept at all and have to make it through this day. I am struggling. I can say that addiction has truly defeated me. I am not thinking clearly but am clear enough to still keep secrets. This is the only place I know that I can just put it out there. Please here me g**. I'm so sorry. It's just me sitting here. Foxhole prayers. My soul is broken. And it's my fault. I'm so sorry.
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Hang in there! I've been exactly where you are, but I don't believe it's your fault. We don't chose addiction; addiction is the symptom so look behind the drinking and drugging. What are you trying to escape? I wasted so many years self-medicating for a litany of mental illness diagnoses. Today I'm on medication (legal meds ha ha) in therapy and have a great AA sponsor. When I wake up I take ownership of my actions; I no longer have to hide from my actions.
Love & Light ♥
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There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.
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