Know this is a crazy question but if you have so much trouble with being gay & you hate gay sex & you aren't attracted to the gay guys....then what in the world makes you think you are gay? or is it just a label you tried to stick on yourself because nothing else was working either????

I have seen kids in school do this sometimes girls to protect themselves from getting into a relationship that could land them pregnant if they don't have the ability to say NO!!!!!! and guys who don't want to be forced into having sex with girls like the rest of society is telling them they have to in order to be NORMAL.

There is just too much emphasis placed on sex these days instead of getting to know a person & letting the relationship grow from friendship into something more....or not if it's obvious there is no compatibility....without having to have sex involved. It's the entertainment industry that has been brainwashing everyone that life is nothing without sex no matter how you can get it......they surround us with that brainwashing continually.....& we are sucker enough to buy into it.

Life is about being human.....having things that interest us.....doing things that we like to do, sports, hobby's, activities......anything that interests.....& is seems if you put as much energy into researching things you are interested in as you do feeling horrible about yourself.....you might actually find something in life that you would enjoy doing.

Your issues with religion sound like they are just as much about their basis on homosexuality as I fought the pressure on what was thought about women.......I have sense come to understand & learn that there is a lot more to Christianity than what the religious people try to shove on people.....& it has become a huge part of my life.....& I enjoy studying & reading & learning. I also found painting quite by accident just 2 years ago. I have to admit that living alone on my farm & having to do all the repairs myself keeps me more than busy so I don't have the time to socialize that I would love to have.........& add horse riding to my list.....& volunteering at the horse park decorating the cross country course for the shows they have there....started doing that when they had the World Equestrian games here.

There are so many things to volunteer in & be involved in that have absolutely NOTHING to do with SEXUAL issues. One thing that I kept hoping I could get involved in but with pain issues won't be able to is the search & rescue.....it would have taken stamina I would have had to build up to.....but pain issues & medication issues at the moment make that impossible.....but there are so many other things to be involved in like habitat for humanity, rehab facilities can always use volunteers....or we have centers where they help out those who don't have funds for food who are always needing volunteer help in the staffing.

You need to get out of yourself & like this older lady friend says.....she needs to stop having her pity party & inviting everyone to join her.

Stop volunteering with the gay people & start volunteering in a totally neutral based environment. Get out of where you are stuck & see what life really does have to offer.......or is that what might frighten you because it is the unknown?

All of your "I can't's" you sound so much like my ex-H.......I have been trying to figure out how such a nice guy could have so many issues that made our marriage a nightmare....& I have made a huge list of things that seriously point to asperger's.......& social interaction issues are a huge part of that....just a thought that might be worth investigating.

I do admire that you have stood your ground & not continue to be forced into behavior that goes outside your values.......you may not see that as something admirable.....but standing up against any pressure in this day & age is a wonderful trait & one you should be VERY PROUD OF!!!!!