Thanks for the support.

What I think s4nd is saying: Of course, if I don't want them around, it HAS to be my husband telling me I can't associate with them, cutting me off from my family, because all husbands are controlling of their wives, right? That's the world they know.

Earlier this morning when my nephew (he lives with us now) was talking to his mother on the phone, her husband (not nephew's father) told her to hang up on him, and she did, which upset him terribly because his mother is choosing her convicted felon of a husband over her son. But it's MY husband who is controlling, not hers, because he doesn't want that known thief in our house, which is why brother-in-law is angry and didn't want sister talking to nephew.

Yes, my husband does put limits on who can come over. That's not without reason, since it seems every time we have visitors, something ends up disappearing. Not just my sister's husband, but other members of my family have stolen from us and are therefore no longer welcome here. But all this is because I "married money" and now think I'm too good for them. My husband is an uppity, rich, snob of a control freak who won't share his toys with the less fortunate. (Again I point out, he's a middle-class bus driver, but to them, I suppose, that looks like "money.") I allow it because I've forgotten where I came from, and I don't remember what it's like to be in their situation, where I'm just so poor I don't know where my next bite of food is coming from. To that last one--oh, yes I do! I remember it all too well. That's why I won't go back to it!

I realize I'm not any better than they are, in the sense that I too am a recovering alcoholic, but the emphasis is on the word "recovering." Right now, this moment, if the entire family were to be randomly tested for street drugs, who would test positive? Not me or my husband, for sure. My nephew isn't showing any signs of it either. Anybody else, including mother, siblings, daughters, or any of their significant others, I honestly think they would.

Oh, and thanks for the crab repellent. I hope it works.