Quote:
Originally Posted by IndestructibleGirl
Thank you Leah  The thing is when she went outside the boundaries, she became more than a T. And I can't scale it back in my head or heart. I can get a lot out of therapy with her intellectually for sure, but that is it. Something in me has retreated from her, and I don't feel 'safe'. This is exceedingly annoying, because I have never been so vulnerable with anyone before in my entire life. I was at the point in my own head where I felt okay about crying in front of her, for example. It hadn't happened, but I kept being very close to it, and was pretty calm about it. Now, the idea makes me want to retch again. I can't go there. Not with her. With another T in future, where they haven't fu.cked things up a bit unintentionally, I know I definitely can. |
That's how you feel *now*
If you quit therapy, that's how you will continue to feel.
Feelings change and ruptures can be resolved. You can't scale back today, but you'd be surprised how resilient a good therapy relationship can be, that you may be able to successfully rebuild the relationship and feel safe again. That's not a guarantee, but if you quit now, I don't think you're giving yourself a fair opportunity for for a reparative experience.
I want you to give yourself some time.
Good relationships gone sour can get good again.
That's something hard for me to accept too, but I have found it's true. That's what I'm not sure if you're considering right now, that potential.
It just looks like, from the outside, you've had a number of major concerns arise almost simultaneously, and your emotions are on high intensity and you're on high alert. Fight or flight, fight or flight.... but what if you did neither. What if you sat with these feelings and just observed them and told your therapist where you were emotionally in the relationship?