Dear T,

I keep wanting to "write to you" on here. Wth?! I miss you terribly all of a sudden and it is so hard for me to allow that feeling when I'm all up in my head intellectualizing how you're just a T..... /: But there is no mistaking it - I'm missing you. I either feel completely detached from you or I'm highly needy. A middle ground would be welcome....But sometimes I secretly just want to need you and for that to truly be ok with you To be honest, I don't even know why I "need" you or what I need - it's just a yearning for you to be there. How do I talk to you about this when I go into self-loathing mode just admitting it to myself? I know as soon as it came out of my mouth I would just be overcome with anger I NEED to work through this with you.

I have no reason not to trust you, T.

You really are in this for the long-haul, aren't you?