Quote:
Originally Posted by CandiceJane87
I'm having some difficulties with my marriage at the moment, and I needed to talk to someone as its chewing me up so much, me and my depression cant handle it anymore.
I'm happily married with an amazing, supportive husband. Recently I was at the gym and discovered an ex who i havent spoken to in a long time also works out there. we said a breif hello and that was it. later that night he messaged me on facebook and after some general chit chat, the tone of the conversation turned to our history, and some fun times we had sexually. he expressed some wishes for things he would have liked to have done in the past and i told him he shouldnt have been chicken and shouldve done them.
my husband read this exchange in my facebbok messages and wants an answer as to why i had this conversation. the bit i'm struggling to deal with, and that my husband cant understand, is that i dont know why i did. i love my husband unconditionally, i am not attracted to this ex, nor do i wish our relationship had gone further. i have no desire whatsoever to cheat on my husband at all. but my husband wants answers, and i dont even know what those answers are myself.
please help!
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to put it quite simply, you crossed the line when you engaged your ex in a sexual conversation. the ex was baiting you and you took the bait so to speak.
this lead me to believe your marriage is not a happy as you present.
this situation is a matter of respect, out of respect for your husband..the conversation should have never come to that.
let me ask you this how would you feel if your husband was trading sexually charged messages and discussions with one of his ex's?
would you feel a lil insecure?
would you be upset?
would you be jealous?
would you be ok with that?
this type of behavior can set a dangerous precedent which could ultimately destroy your marriage. by bringing up this subject i'm sure your ex had intentions for you and it wasn't to play scrabble i can assure you that.
not saying that you would cheat( i know nothing of your character so i'm not qualified to judge that) but what if you husband think everything is fair game now because you introduced new rules?
if you wouldn't be ok having this discussion you had on facebook on the phone in front of your husband..you probably shouldn't be doing it.
i don't know if the ex knows if you are married or not..but if he does, he is a snake for going there. if he didn't that may be different. at any route, you know you are married and it would be a good idea to keep away from this guy
i hope this helps
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I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper!
