I have a vacation coming up during Labor Day week. I just had one at the end of April so I'm basically trying not to call in mentally ill in the meantime. I'm going to try to get a long vacation at Christmas time since there's only two work days around our holidays. My immediate supervisor knows I see a psychiatrist, but does not know why, so maybe I can get her to consider that when looking for approval for those extra days.

amandalouise - I am having some change in my work life these days, and my husband thinks that's the trigger. I'm changing duties in the near future so I have to learn new things. In the meantime, I am in a sort of limbo and keeping myself busy helping others with their work. Without a definite focus, it leaves all kinds of time for dissociation.

I also recently started driving again, and it terrifies me. I'm traumatized by an accident we had last November. My husband was stopped at a light, I was in the front passenger seat, and someone hit us going 45 miles an hour, according to the police officer. It messed up my back and I will probably always use a cane now.

So between the limbo and the driving, I feel doomed and unsafe. I just don't know how to keep going. I'm already on six psych meds, I don't think there's anything else to add! I have psychotic things happen at work occasionally despite being on 20 mg of Abilify, as well as the switching and it just becomes too much to handle.

I try to use the tools I learned in therapy, but it's hard to do alone. It's much easier when my husband is around. I don't dare tell anyone at work about my diagnosis, so there's no one to support me there.

StarryNight - I am so impressed with what you are accomplishing!

Thank you so much for all the replies. I feel better knowing there's people who understand. I put this post on a depression forum and only got one reply from someone who didn't know what to say, but just wanted to say she sent hugs. Hugs are good, but DID can be a very lonely place to be, ironically enough.