Quote:
Originally Posted by I.Am.The.End.
Isn't there a step before kissing though? The whole finding someone who won't pressure me into the physical stuff immediately and that I might actually want to kiss step? I don't even know how to do that...the only person to have shown interest in me recently was trying to push me to hard too fast. I don't think I can feel comfortable or safe around him...and for some reason, I don't feel anything towards him. Even the thought of kissing him makes me cringe.
And as for people I'm actually interested in, there's only one and I really need to forget about him because of who he is and what I likely am to him. Among other things. All the other guys I've had interest in are completely out of my life. Basically, there's no one to practice enjoying kissing with. I go back to school in the fall, but I'll just run into the same problems...undergrads are intimidated by me or think I'm too old and grad students are already married/engaged or in a long-term relationship already. I've tried online dating...they all pushed me way past my boundaries and made me more uncomfortable than before.
And despite the backlash I get from guys, offline I make ALL the first moves the majority of the time.
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well yes, you know..the flirting step, getting close to each other to feel the sexual tension..that type of thing yes.
it all starts with eye contact..this shows interest on both parties part, when you lock eyes with someone that's the starting point..then of course conversation and feeling each other out.
online dating is a disaster(stay away! LOL!) i won't mess with it..huge waste of time. face to face is easily the best. by a long shot.
so the guy that's trying to push too hard too fast, may want to scratch him.
really you want to be somewhere in the middle, some one that knows what to do without being overly aggressive..sexual hints in conversation is good, obviously you don't want the guy to go overboard, but you want to know the guy has some experience and can walk you through this and be understanding.
it's good to make the first move..because you are in control and can see what direction things are going to go, i believe if you keep at it..you'll be fine.
the whole dating/mating game can be difficult at times..largely bcos of compatibility issues( kinda like what you were referring to in a previous post)
but it can be done, takes time , practice, trial and error.
me i have it down to a science bcos i have a lot of experience, so i know what to do, what not to do & how to read signals & interpret them.now, of course i don't get every single girl i go after.but i'm quite successful & proud of what i have been able to get done
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I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper!
