I don't know your age, but when my sister and I were younger, say up to about mid 40s, we were at odds over just about everything. (There were real reasons that I won't go into now). With life experience and age we both sort of mellowed, and get along better now than we ever did before. She is supportive of me in my illness and knows more about me than anyone else. It's nice to be able to call my sister my friend also. My advice would be to try to have a relationship with them but keep your distance. Realize their problem with you is just that: their problem, not yours. I hope things get better soon.