Outside of therapy, I have completely normal levels of eye contact (at least, nobody has told me otherwise and I have been successful with interpersonal relationships). However, inside that room is an entirely different ball game. I make it a point to look at her at the beginning when we are greeting each other because I know it might be my last time to look at her for that hour. I can tell you virtually every detail of the room - there are lots of intriguing patterns and I find myself getting lost in tracing those patterns with my eyes.

I sometimes wonder if it is unhealthy that I don't look at her but I haven't asked about it. There was only one session that she asked me to look at her eyes and it was only briefly.