I am, too, finally accepting my illness. I have bipolar not other wise specified, which is what i was diagnosed with years ago but i didn't know what to do about it. My pdoc would talk about avoidant personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, schizoaffective disorder, but i just couldn't put a finger on what i really had. But the best part is that there is a name for the pain and i can move on. Thanks for your post.