Lauliza,

No, my life is not perfect, thus why I am seeing a therapist. I was in a bad hunting accident almost 1 1/2 years ago, where I was shot in the head. If it wasn't for my "maladaptive" skills, I probably would not have survived. Those skills saved my life, until someone who wasn't totally freaking out/and/or frozen Those being my best friend and my husband, I would not have made it. I had to make the 911 call. If I had not had the ability to dissociate and compartmentalize I would not have been able to do it... Of course it only lasted for a few minutes before I was not in any shape to do anything, but it saved my life.

As far as my relationships.... At work I am Great.... at home my life sucks.. except for my horses and my other animals. I am married to someone who has his own issues, and apparently am subject to verbal abuse quite a bit..... so maybe that is the area that could be seen as "maladaptive" I believe in Marriage, I believe in the commitment and I stay, even though it hurts..... if dissociating so I don't feel the pain helps.. then it is how I cope...

When I stop dissociating and I start trying to cope, I use terrible coping skills, I turn to drugs, and binge/purging, and some self harm... thus to me dissociation, seems like a much better coping skill for me.

I breath, I meditate, I use mindfulness, but I don't know if I need to deal with all the pain of the past if I can just tuck it away.

I don't think that my bad relationship comes from dissociation, I think it comes from growing up in a very unstable relationship and thinking that the only form of love comes with pain... that comes from working through pain... Not sure if I would call that maladaptive as much as I would call that dealing with my past.

You bring up some good points... I guess I just like Denial... works well for me at times