Quote:
Originally Posted by Disorder7
Yeppers. I know people who are on here regularly probably get tired of me posting about it, but I call it "euphoric rage" and that's the form of mania I have. I don't have the happy rainbow type of mania.
You should get help, because my mania escalated to physical violence before I got help. But in the beginning it was just words. It was just words until one day I discovered what a wonderful rush it is to put your hands on someone when you have all of that powerful energy surging through your system.
And jobs? I've blown through more jobs than I can count, mainly due to my temper and my quick impulse to suddenly quit. I'm basically self-employed because no one will hire me with the references I have. I'm also bankrupt because it's hard to pay bills without a steady income.
So yeah, take my advice and get help.
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What you just described is 100% me. I'm not a bad person. I have had 1 violent episode which is not like me at all. I work in health care field for brain injured clients, go figure, lol. I've been through 7 jobs in 5 years.mi always end up blowing up at work and telling the boss where to go and usually make a scene before they fire me. I started on wellbutrin 300mg and 2mg Ativan when needed. They have been working great for a few months but just the other day is when the worst outburst ever happened. I've been some what depressed for a few weeks and then it hit me over something stupid but it hit hard. I could feel my pulse race, I started sweating, yelling, stuttering, threatening my boss verbally, blood pressure through the roof, shacking in the hands and then about 20 minutes later, I crashed and started almost crying and saying sorry cause what seemed correct at the time of my episode, really was he dumbest thing I could of ever done. Thank god my employer had sympathy and understood I was having a problem and let me take a 6-8 week short term disibility leave till I see a psychiatric doctor to see what he says. My family doc signed me off due to extreme mental stress and manic episodes but he said the psychiatric doc may want me off longer.