Sorry if I am posting too much. I am just feeling the need to vent. This morning I woke up with a sense of dread about going to work. An anxiety attack almost. I hate worrying about what will happen at work today. I am still nursing my wounds from the big event on Wednesday when I was called into the office manager's office. I tried to stay quiet and stay out of everyone's way. At one point today I contemplated ending my life, but of course decided against it. I always come up with reasons to stay here, even if I am hurting.

In spite of how I feel, the day was not so bad. It was a busy day at work but everyone left me alone. For this I am thankful, and God answered my desperate prayers. I wish I could overcome my negative feelings and be a better mom to my adult children.

Sorry for the long post. Just needed to vent.