I had to drive about an hour and a half to get to my family Easter today. I cried all the way... Sobbing at some points. I'm trying so hard to keep my strength up as I have a 5 year old son. I don't want to suffer anymore but I can't bear him having to live without a mother. Today is the first time I contemplated checking myself into a hospital, but I keep trying to be stronger than that. I thought about calling a crisis line as well, but I can't get any words out, just tears. What happens if u go to a hospital? It's Easter wknd, so there's no way I can get into my T or doctor. Thanks so much for all of your kind words and advice. My family has no idea how bad I am right now. It's so difficult keeping myself together right now.