A suggestion: Think of something or somebody that really ticks you off. Then try to explain to yourself how that person may have learned to behave or think or feel the way they do.

I think I have said this kind of thing several times in my book and probably on this forum. I'm impressed that getting an understanding of how a person became who they are--the circumstances they have lived through, the relationships they have experienced, the hard times they have faced, etc. Even if one is not a psychologist or psychiatrist, I think we can explain (or conjecture) enough about a persons history that it becomes understandable to why the other person did what he/she did or does. Once you are there, it is less likely that one will hate the "enemy." It is when we conjecture that the other person have evil intentions--desires that hurt us--that we get mad. Those explanations of their behavior are our beliefs...which may not be accurate or fair. When we see that our viewpoints have contributed mightily to the development of our anger, they we are closer to having some empathy or compassion for the person we are mad at.

It takes careful thoughts to understand another person...especially one that has upset us at the moment.

drclay