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Old Jun 29, 2015, 01:27 PM
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HeraDelacour HeraDelacour is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 5
I am at a loss of where to turn for answers as i cannot find anything explaining what i went through so I am hoping someone here may have an idea.

I was diagnosed with disociation 3yrs ago. My dr hadnt explained why or how he made this diagnosis and I hadnt asked at the time because I didnt see why he figured I had this, I just figured he threw it in with the rest of my disorders. I am a 26yr old female also diagnosed with ocpd, generalized anxiety disorder, and major depression disorder. I had a very mentally and emotionally abusive childhood, where i would severely withdraw from the world where I would be motionless and staring into nothing for very long periods of time.

Last night i realized that up until yesterday afternoon i had been in a disociative episode. My husband has called me last night reminding me about a conversation that we had been having over last 3 days. After arguing that i didnt know we even had this conversation, we realized i had had an episode. I, no matter how hard i tried could not even remember an inkling of this conversation, no details of the last 3 days, except for a couple tiny moments of cleaning the house, even as he was explaining to me what took place, I could recall no memory at all. I did not even have a feeling/naggung sensation,etc of having not been able to recount for lost days, it just seemed time went on as normal. It was like it never even happend at all, and wouldnt have known it happend unless it had happend to have been something that my husband and i had been talking about still, etc. I came out of the episode through a wave of exhaustion that lasted 10 seconds. My husband says that during this episode i had a demeanor that was completely opposite of what i normally am and functional but didnt think anything of it, and returned to normal when episode ended. I go through this 1-2x a week with just my husband alone, having these confusions of him claiming we had certain conversations, and me having no idea when it took place or that it even did take place. As far as how many episodes I've had while interacting with others or by myself, I don't know unless by some miracle it comes to life like this one with my husband did. Stress is a major trigger. We figure that these episodes last minutes or hours at most, with this recent one of three days being the lonest.
As I have stated above, I have no memory of thse episodes whatsoever from when,how, who was involved,etc or that any time was even lost. With that being said, I have absolutely no way of telling how I was feeling mentally or physically while experiencing these episodes because as far as I am aware they do not exist at all unless by some miracle they happen to come to light as this recent one did.
Hugs from:
Werewoman