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Originally Posted by cluelessgal
Okay....I'm gonna play the devil's advocate here...
But people search stupid "dark" stuff all the time. I Google "How to kill your brother" but it's just for humor and I really love my brother.
He is still young and you're the mature one in this relationship. I think you do understand that it's difficult for your husband....but it's also very difficult for your stepson....that he has no place to call home.
Young people are verbally violent by nature....are opnionated...feel like they need to fix someone....say things just to hurt you (because deep down they are hurt). But you do see that he's making some improvements.
Just support him to go to therapy and help your husband help him to be independent.
Generally people turn killers hurt animals first. Has he ever tortured an animal?? What are the other reasons you feel he can hurt you?
I think you should go to therapy yourself and discuss this with your therapist. We all don't know about psychology to give any useful answers.
Maybe your gut feeling is right........that way you can ensure that he gets help.
Maybe your gut feeling is wrong.....that way you can avoid hurting someone emotionally. Accusing someone of something when they are no way close to it can leave damage of a lifetime....and he still is very young and has mental health issues.
All the best.
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I understand your position and I have struggled with those very questions. It's not easy and isn't easy.
My stepson is 20 and he has been in therapy with 2- Psychiatrists and 1- Psychologist over a period of time and whom have shared notes about him. It was a consensus that they believed there was deeper issues with him. In fact, he threatened to punch one of them in the mouth if hey said something he didn't like. Did I mention that what landed him in therapy to begin with was because he was hooked on watching CHILD porn? Violent Child porn? He followed me around my home and refused to leave me alone until I agreed with him on his issues of choice. He refused to observe boundaries in my home, meaning he would walk in my room and search through my personal belongings anytime he pleased, just because he can. These are only a few of the things he would do.
As far as therapy, I was in therapy at the same time my stepson was in therapy. Sometimes together and sometimes apart. The Dr's and therapist wanted to interview me and my husband. We continued it for several months, at least once a week and sometimes more. My stepson stopped going after about 2 months. He couldn't or didn't want to believe what the Dr's/therapist were telling him. They felt that he was disturbed and needed more help than they could provide.
He will not be living back in my home.