i think sometimes it is past experiences that i feel i failed at. driving very long distances makes me very anxious and i do not drive interstates because of anxiety. i think this comes from going very far away from home for college and what a negative experience that was. being 17 and getting lost trying to find an airport in a place i didn't know. trying to make it home in a snowstorm only to feel unwelcome once i got there. the sum of all these experiences that were so awful at the time. one after another failed friendships in my life. that has led to no interest in trying to talk to people or make friends. idk i also come from a long line of worriers i think it is all these things combined as to the "why".