Thank you for posting your "thesis" here. You are an advanced writer!

I see you got much going for you here. Now make a list of the good things about yourself. I see you got much intelligence going for you, and you write much better than I do. You are placed in the right kind of school.

You are feeling worthless because of the situation you grew up in, and you seem to have a good handle on it for someone your age. You even got a better handle on it, than most adults do. Seeing a counselor will help you sort things out about yourself. Learn about Who You Are, for you got much going for you.