Quote:
Originally Posted by lilodian4ever
Hey ! I'm so glad that some of my gospel helped you 
And, I'm really glad that you're actually reading The Power of Now and applying its teachings. That's GREAT !!! That book will take you to a better place in life, I know it !
The fact that you're able to observe your mind and notice that it is overthinking, shows that you're moving towards being present and "conscious", as the book puts it. |
A few minutes ago, my father was lecturing me on how I and my Brother are stupid and show disinterest in learning the motives behind some chinese cultures that are practice traditionally. Initially, I started to feel the anger and irritability of being labelled "stupid" as I felt my father was quite being arrogant and full of himself.
I started to step back and look at what my mind is trying to react towards the situation. My mind was in the state of anger and trying to prove itself. Then, I feel I was
detached from it and no longer thinking in the same frequency. It was just me listening to my father without any tainted intentions, my mind was just there foolishly trying to fight for itself. It was as though I was I belong in another layer that nobody could see
me. It got me through this intense lecture on cultures and stuff while I listened passively without and obstructed thoughts.
I'm practicing this habit slowly whenever I can notice some shift in my mood and thoughts. It will take time, and it was as though it is backing up the religious studies that I've been learning for the past few years.
Quote:
Originally Posted by crosstobear
Okay, here are my thoughts. First, I'd like to extend some empathy because when I was younger I had much of the same feelings. I still consider myself an overthinker, and remember people who have come and gone from my life ages ago, and still "feel" emotions associated with them when I think of them. Gone are the facts that they've probably matured and grown as people, too. What remains is how I felt back then.
I don't know too much about Singaporean culture and how your people look at relationships and interaction between the sexes, but I will tell you this. Borderline disorder and traits associated with it put you into what I call the "scarcity mindset" when it comes to relationships. You latch on to someone who gives you attention or slight affection and believe that you'll never meet a better person or have another chance at love or a life partner again. Do away with that. There are 6 billion people in the world and for someone to love you they have to witness you and grasp you on a very, very deep level. Not give you crumbs of affection or attention. I mean, they have to face the monster inside you and wipe its tears. They have to know you with all your demons and still believe you are worth it. That's what I can tell you about it based on what I've seen people close to me who are married are like. And just so you don't think I'm singling you out, everyone has a monster inside them.
It was very difficult for me to understand the temporariness of people's presence in life. People do come and go and all you are left with is their memory and how they make you feel. If anything, Buddhism, Islam, and a couple other faiths teach you to detach from the material world for this very reason. These faiths knew how temporary and fleeting human life is, and how painful the world is for all of us. You will get to a point where letting go comes easier, I guarantee it. Borderline disorder gets better with age and maturation. What helped me was a mix of tough love, growing up, therapy, and putting myself in the position to make it my life's work to help people in the same boat. I work in the mental health field and this giving to the field helps me take focus off of my own worries and let me tell you something, any kind of helping profession whether it is nursing, mental health, social services, anything- that shows you other people's suffering and makes you responsible to them, will make you grow up quick. You'll look back at what made you sad back then and smirk.
It'll get better. And feel free to vent.
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It's the biggest conflict against me that I have yet to overcome it. When it comes to
Love, i find it unusually difficult to step out of it than the example that I have written at the first paragraph of my reply. It was relatively easy to interpret the meaning behind your views, but I am not at that stage yet unfortunately.
It would be better to describe my feels this way. It's like everybody goes through a rebellious stage during teenage years, even my parents and my grandparents have gone through that. They
have to, and they had already gone through that stage. Right now, I am
in that stage.