Quote:
Originally Posted by just2b
I want my T to be like a mom to me, and i know she cant. I struggle with this and host has no idea. T gave system a blanket a long time ago and I am curled up in that and just coming off of 5 vodka drinks mixed with oj. Gosh my head hurts. I just want T to hold me and she will never. and using blankie wont ever fill that void. Is there anything that will? Host will be mad she is not very understanding of needs when it comes to wanting T. Not even sure what got me out today.because of the feelings for T I much rather have stayed in. not sure what got me out and honestly it pisses me off
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Hello, You need to take better care of yourself. Drinking will only make things worse as far as making things fuzzy and aggravating depression.
Also, I am confused and maybe you can help me out here when it comes to your sense of self and perspective. When I read what you have written I notice there is a mixing of 'baby talk' (example Blankie) and adult talk--like "it pisses me off."
Again, I am just wondering where you are coming from. How can these two states be mixed up in the same moment like this? can you give me any direction here?
thank you for sharing. hugs