Back in February of 2015 I almost killed myself. I had the bottle of pills in my hand but in the end I decided to put them up. I was worried I didn't have enough to kill myself. If I had 1 more pill, to make it double the max daily dose, I would have done it. To this day I still regret not doing it. I turned to my wife for help and got yelled at. I feel like I can't trust her anymore and when I bring that up she makes me feel like I'm the bad guy. I think about suicide daily, but in the end I'm too much of a coward to do it now.