Half of my real friends don't really talk to me anymore. A lot of them have moved on with their life: married, have kids, etc. I hate Facebook. It makes me depressed. Sometimes I'm tempted on deleting it but I keep it around so family will contact me. I just hardly ever update it or log on ever. There's just no point. I'm a loner and have nobody to hang out with. Pretty much a loner and the only friends I have are online. There's times where I long to have real life friends in person and this depresses me so much. Sometimes I fear that once people get to know me and find out I suffer from PTSD and that I'm depressed, they won't want to be my friend anymore. Anytime a friend stops talking to me I end up crying and blaming myself for it. I don't self harm myself or anything like that, I just cry. I'm very hard on myself a lot of the time and I must get out of this cycle. Have horrible low self esteem and I feel like nobody will ever want to be my friend. I'm even afraid to go into the chat room on here because I'm afraid people will pick on me or something. I feel so pathetic and I hate this...