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Old Nov 30, 2016, 11:33 PM
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Wander Wander is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: Milky Way
Posts: 4,746
Quote:
Originally Posted by xRavenx View Post
Thank you. (((Hugs))) Sorry it took me a little while to reply. My boss added extra responsibilities to my job. My days and hours are so long. My depression is wearing me down, so every task feels like it takes so much effort. I feel my mental health issues also contributed to the recent end of my relationship, which sometimes makes me feel like a failure and that I can no longer sustain relationships. I'm missing the way things used to be when I was happy in a relationship years back, and I miss my best friend who died last year. It's as if I want to be all alone, but too much time alone isn't good for me.

As far as friends go, my friend got mad at me for not being able to be there for her. Her reaction was extreme. I just feel like I can't keep up with people or things the way I used to. I'm angry at myself for not being able to keep up, but I also get angry when others ask too much from me. I'm more likely to take that anger inward though, although I do eventually explode when it builds over a period of time. I am glad I have my therapy appointment Monday, but my pdoc appointment isn't for another 3 weeks, so I am hoping when I call the office that she can squeeze me in sometime sooner.
That's a lot of stress and I am so sorry you lost your friend. You seem torn in too many directions. Time alone is crucial but as you said, too much time can be bad. It is unfair of your friends to expect more than you can give, but understandable they will react. Can you mend these friendships and perhaps catch up when you are able?

Glad you are seeing your T, really hope you can get a closer pdoc appointment. Keep us posted. We care.
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Bipolar 1 with psychotic features
PTSD




"Phew! For a minute there I lost myself."

'Karma Police' by Radiohead
Hugs from:
bizi, OctobersBlackRose, Wild Coyote, xRavenx
Thanks for this!
Wild Coyote, xRavenx