does anyone on here have a wake up call

that moment when they knew.. right, i'm depressed, something needs to be done about this now!

mine was actually sitting down with myself and trying to think about what I wanted for the new year, and I realised that actually, the thing I wanted more than anything was death

I didn't just want it, it needed to happen- that's when I knew I was totally depressed.. when answers to all my own questions- what do you want, where do you see yourself, ended up dead or death