It's exhausting trying to appear stable and normal and happy. I expend an enormous amount of energy doing this. I find that I must have down time. I have to be good to myself in that way or I might go get a frigging bottle of bourbon-no good. Today I blew off by bf, didn't answer the phone, am holing up in my little cottage with food, smokes, paints for my art, waiting on a big snow storm, with me, myself and I. And it feels pretty good to put on pajamas at 3 o 'clock in the afternoon. I've been running hard this vacation, my children left today and I just have to recoup. Maybe you could tell hubby you just need some down time to rest. I think we have to be transparent in communication with our partners if possible. It is hard but hey, we are who we are. You've got needs. We bipolars are rather fragile. We have to go easy on ourselves and not push too hard when that little voice says no.