I don't think there's anything at all therapeutic or respectful for a therapist to show up to work moody and not acknowledge that their mood is affecting the person's therapy (and then, as in the OPs case, not acknowledge it until a spouse calls to find out what's going on).

They often tell clients not to be mind readers, so I think that needs to include not having to read the therapist's mind about why things feel so off or weird. What's wrong with them saying at the top of the hour, I'm sorry if I'm not myself today. I'm going through something that's not related to you, and it's affecting my mood.

I went through about 6 months of therapy not knowing that my therapist had been through three major losses until she said something to me when I asked for an "in the event of sudden death" letter to be given to me so that I don't show up for an appointment one day and she's not around and no one has called. I asked for the letter because of the death of another provider and two who moved prior to that, and she said she needed to catch her breath because of these losses of hers. So all that time, I had no idea, and I wish I had. I wasn't upset about not knowing because it wasn't like she was being cold or weird, but it might have explained certain days that seemed off that I couldn't find a reason for.