I finally accepted that my last T couldn't give me what I needed several months after I stopped seeing her, after processing a lot on my own and with the help of posting here on PC.

For several months before the therapy ended, I had been feeling that she couldn't understand or "see" me but still felt that she "should" and I kept trying. So I did, while getting very, very frustrated.

But I never articulated that I felt unseen because that was a trauma from my past that was still unconscious and defended -against.

Eventually, after processing the feeling of rejection by my T for several months, I became aware of the connection with how I had felt unseen and rejected by females in my family of origin. I then experienced a profound depression for several days and am still recovering even though that was several weeks ago.

Don't know if this will help or not. I've had several communications with my last T since then and I still don't think she "gets" or can, because of her own issues -- very possibly with feeling unaccepted by her mother. I know a little about that but not many specifics.

I understand that the specifics with your T are different, but there may be something about accepting that the T can't provide what we still "need" because we didn't get it in the past that may be similar. Maybe you can discuss that, maybe you can't. But the underlying experience from my past was still something that no one here in the present could really help with, except that communicating and interacting with people in the present helped to make it clear that the other situation was in the past. Still very, very sad, though.