I've read that article before when I thought about terminating ex-t around June.

I'll ghost on Freud when I see fit. I terminated at the end of July and I'm still in pain, heartbroken. Lost. Confused. Conflicted. Flummoxed. Torn. Angry (rare for me). You name it.

SHE was free to let her personal crap leak into my therapy. My personal crap is called transference, part of my repetition compulsion, and I have to bare my soul to this person I'm vulnerable to. Spill my guts to the person who scares me the most, because she now had the ability to hurt me (when I became attached).

When her CRAP affected me, it was swept under the rug, denied, and I was told "don't look at, let alone ask, what's behind the curtain." And she became distant and aloof, brushing me off when it became too much for her. She was harsh, critical, and judgemental. Then cool and calculated, a veneer of her real self. Then, she'd let that crap come into play and we couldn't talk about THAT. Gosh no, that's disclosure. And I felt all over the dang place.

By the time she attempted to TRY to pull us out of it, I was all over the place in reaction to her. In the end, she avoided me and we continued that pattern from my childhood; I had picked someone who was insecurely attached as well and I found out she wasn't quite honest with me about a cancellation on her part.
The damage was done.

I'm leaning to going back to therapy. I've never been attached to a therapist before, so this was new...but if I become attached again? I'm out. Done. Finished. Leaving. In that case, I might try and do a termination session just to practice getting better at leaving situations, but who knows when it gets to that point? I don't.