I reaaaaally didn’t want to take my meds tonight. I just feel sooooo good, I don’t want to lose it! But I know what happens when I don’t take my meds. The hypo goes to mania, which turns mixed, which ends with me IP. I don’t want to ruin my life right now. So I took them like a good girl. I even took the trazadone which has calmed me right down. I might even fall asleep. Without it I certainly would have been up half the night.

I wish the hypo had never come back. It’s like s superpower I’m not allowed to have. It feels so amazing but it ruins everything. But I want it. It’s my drug.

Ah well. Hopefully I’ll be calm tomorrow.