for me it's

A- not caring about myself, and feeling I don't deserve self care

and B- because I live alone, so who really cares?

it's not like anyone is going to show up and see me, so..

I shower once a week (or try to). even on days when my mental health worker (or someone else shows up), I don't shower- I usually just wait for the day, usually a friday.

I feel gross for taking one too, grosser than I did before I took one (and I never figured out why that is, it just is)