I struggle too. I want to gain and stop at X number where I am still thin but not so bony. I want to be able to contain the weight gain to the last ounce, or I fear I will immediately become morbidly obese, despite never being obese in my life. I maybe needed to lose 5 lb. in high school and was uncomfortable with my looks, but I wasn’t even considered chubby, much less fat or obese. Though serious obesity runs on my mom’s side of the family. One of my two sisters is obese too, and I don’t want to end up like that.

But now there are clothes I don’t wear any more just to not freak people out. Bones, you know.

Did I do good today? No. I ran and ran and ran, maybe the farther pest I have ever run (though I have run/walked that distance before). Seeing a T tomorrow. Hope maybe she can help.

Had to pick up my daughter from school. She threw up 3 times. She cannot go to school tomorrow because they have a policy if the nurse sends your child home for vomiting, diarrhea, fever, they have to be well for 24 hr. before they can go back to school. The nurse said a bug is going around, but I think my daughter may be gearing up to start her cycle, and that will be fun as she hates blood. I was 12 when I started; she is only 10.5 but all the puberty developments are there. I especially started to wonder when she said her back hurt too. But my youngest sister threw up every time with her period until my mom took her to the gynecologist and she got on the pill. So we’ll see. I really hope if it is her period, she won’t throw up every cycle. She said she felt fine when I picked her up from school and hasn’t thrown up all day.