Quote:
Originally Posted by larry64
I am presently involved in a relationship, where my female mate wants to have male friends that she can talk to when she wants. I have read many online advice things about this question. I think it only leads to problems, further down the line. I don't want to lose her but she has basically given me an ultimatum, accept it or move down the road. I just need to hear some sound, sage advice please. Thank you very much for your time and your considerate advice. sincerely, larry
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Hi there. I believe that people should not restrict each other’s friendships. That would be far too controlling and limiting. It’s a matter of your own comfort level though. Are you comfortable with her having male friends? If you’re not, then you have your answer, but that will also limit you quite a bit when it comes to relationships.
Men and women certainly can be platonic friends without any threat to the relationship. My fiancé and I both have friends of the opposite sex. We are not threatened by those friendships. Both of us are secure enough, we trust each other and we have a solid relationship so there is no threat. I think when people feel insecure about themselves and/ or the relationship, trust issues develop. People have to feel secure in order to feel comfortable with their partner having friends of the opposite sex. If you’re not secure, then it’s going to be a problem.
So the real question is, do you feel secure enough within yourself and within the relationship to feel comfortable with her having male friends? Or are you going to be suspicious of every male friend she has?