Thanks for sharing this. I'm not a mental health professional. But this certainly sounds like depression to me. I do think depression can sometimes be cyclical. And it's possible, I suppose, you'll find your own way out of the current level of depression you're in especially since, it sounds like, what you're experiencing now is new to you. If not, though, you may want to consider seeking some professional mental health treatment... assuming you're not already getting it. I'm glad you at least have your kitty...