s everyone...
So many wishful good thoughts to everyone.

Checking in.. I will try to be short.

I found a t recently, that I will see again next Friday.
I will try best to stick with her.. I hope we continue to click,..
It was a very impulsive appt booking, but I think it's a good thing that I checked in with someone. I was very scattered.

Today has been very odd. .. I can't sleep again... well the last two weeks or so have been sleeping much and been "off ".

I reread a note sent to a coworker, they replied that hope that I get some well deserved and needed vacation time... I wrote g/jibberish utter g/jibberish to them and I know in that moment those "nonsense words made sense".
Emails like That along with many moments of incoherent speech at work the Last week , has had me concerned.

I am thankful for kindness... i am thankful for understanding but realize it only goes so far.

I go on a trip tomorrow, in state.
I had booked something a few months ago.. and now it's hours away of departing. I do have worries that I'll ruin this. Or something will go wrong.

My friend (my ex and I want to stop calliing him that) will be going with me. He will drive.

I have felt pressured for time in a lot of sense, and been trying to as much done, but also checking in to remind myself it may not be possible and things will fall in place-- life isn't perfect - prioritize if I can. just reality of it all, along with my own delays of scattered and jumbled and blank moments.
I felt like I dissociated or something today while outside..things just didn't seem real and too much going on. I spent time in my room, which is a quiet and safe space. That helped a lot.

And now i am here babbling

I got my elementary records also, (as I was looking into brain mapping).
I was going to submit a thread to ask a question but keep editing it. Idk if I will submit it.

My elementary school records, they had a handicap of perceptual communication disorder ((I think/recall right now at least)) something I hadn't read on before.
I sent the paper work to my new t and will try to remember to ask her if she may give me some help on understanding...
I hadn't known this about me.. my parents.. they just had/have their own issues.

I've always been thankful for teachers in my life and now I am realizing even more on why.... I think it's good to recognize too, because their kindness probably helped me out so much.
I have been aware as an adult, that a lot of times I dont process information like others, but I try... or try best to.