Hello Everyone,

I am not sure what to say other than I feel extremely hopeless. I started not feeling like myself around three and a half months ago. Nothing is interesting to me and I feel absolutely no joy or comfort. Everyday is a 24/7 hell. I know something is very wrong but I have trouble reaching out and if I do I don’t feel like people can really help me. Over the years I had one inpatient hospitalization and most recently an outpatient program I went to. Neither helped me. Over the years I have tried almost every anti depressant, mood stabilizer, and anti psychotic in addition to Tms. This time is the worst ever and not a day goes by when I don’t think of suicide or how I am going to do it. I can’t think straight. I feel like my thoughts are out of order and feel I am spinning out of control. I still go to work, shower, eat when I can, and take care of my cat. Has anyone else had this experience? What do you do when you feel you’re out of options?