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Old Jul 11, 2021, 07:09 PM
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leomama leomama is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Feb 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 4,703
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheEbonyEwe View Post
I was raised that saying something like “MUST BE NICE TO HAVE ________”. (Enter whatever the other person is jealous of, money, looks, talent) is ill mannered. It shows that you’re envious and can’t deal with your own shortcomings, or lack of whatever it is you’re commenting on. In other words, you’re just plain jealous and can’t deal with it.

Other ways they say it are: “I wish I had your ______. “ talent, looks, money, etc. with the intention being that the comment makes you feel guilty for your blessings. It’s just plain nasty to me, why a friend would say something like that.

What’s a good comeback for that so they stop saying it? I have a friend who can’t stand that I play piano and she gets nasty about it and always says something sarcastic like, “welll, don’t you just steal the show!” Then she’ll roll her eyes and make a face. I want to stay friends, but I’d like to shut her up with something witty. Can’t think of anything. Help!

An alternative is you can try showing empathy , I don’t know your situation or that of those around you, but speaking for myself, if I find myself making dismissive comments it means I should back away from the person that I feel bad about . It can be hard for those with hardships to be around those with few hardships, to put it simply.
It depends on you and your friend’s level of maturity, as to what’s driving the feelings/comments.