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Originally Posted by atisketatasket
Two therapy appointments today. Two sets of cleavage on display. (Info was sick so we shifted to Zoom but she still managed cleavage somehow in a sweatshirt--pale blue terry, if you must know.)
I'm still making my mind up about Visa.
Pros: Extremely useful on the hearing disability issue. Doesn't resort to cliches or infantilize/talk down to me. Generally avoids typical therapist-y lines and psychobabble and doesn't BS me.
Cons: Admitted today she has ADHD and that was why she kept glancing at her laptop screen (open email). I mean she didn't seem any less effective for it and she apologized and offered to close it when I asked "what do you keep looking at on the screen?" Also admitted she gets impatient when she has to repeat herself because I don't hear her. (She wasn't noticeably impatient, she just volunteered that she does have a tendency that way.)
I talked about the same issue with both (the new request for accommodations is going just about as well as you would expect, meaning badly) and Visa took the logical approach and Info took the emotional approach. I guess it was a good complement.
Info also complained that if she had credit card logos on her desk for clients to see, I'd have told her off about them by now. But I haven't told Visa off. (What can I say? Sometimes I'm nice to the new people.)
I would actually appreciate advice or thoughts if anyone has any. Thanks.
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Your T using a disability as an excuse is not really ethical or professional. T's who state their own life experiences and/or disabilities should only do so if it helps to benefit the client, not as an excuse for being inattentive, distracted, or otherwise lacking in areas that you might need during session. Furthermore, the licensing of mental health professionals sometimes includes disclosing their mental disabilities and adhering to standards for which therapists must have their disabilities under control and/or managed in some way so that it doesn't affect the nature of their job, the treatments they offer their clients, and/or harm. Based on these things that I've known about and/or read about, it would appear that your T is bordering on being unethical, not adhering to the state's licensing requirements, and affecting your treatment. There are many different T's who are good at their work, despite having a mental disability or otherwise. But that's because they have learned to manage their disability so that it doesn't affect their work in a negative way - operative word here is "negative." Sometimes disabilities could be positive, but it takes getting to know their clients/patients well enough beforehand, and it should benefit their treatment - not just the relationship themselves.
Your T might react defensively if you bring that up, so this is a tricky area. Most of the time, us peers would offer you advice on speaking with your T about those concerns. However, in this case, your T sounds like her ADHD is not managed well, based on her using it as an excuse during your session.
You have a choice to report her to the board, after first speaking with her about that. You'd then have to find a new T, because you wouldn't be able to continue with her if you report her to the board. Or, you don't report her, but you have an exit conversation with her and then find a new T on your own. Or, your don't waste your money and time on her, and instead, you have grounds to just quit and find a new T altogether. If she is being supervised by someone in an agency, you could report that to the supervisor instead of to the board, but then it might create conflicts for you to feel safe with any other T in that organization.
Honestly, if it were me, I'd find a new T.