Been sober twice for eleven years. Every time i hit eleven I drank. Realized there had to be something going on that i was not aware of or this would not keep happening. I have been in AA worked the steps ect. but never realized that i had other problems that could not be helped with AA. I now have 10 months and am in therapy dealing with DID, PTSD, whatever and feel i finally have a chance. This process really sucks some days and i really feel like i can't continue but then with the help of friends i get through it and the next day or so days later i feel ok again. Therapy is very hard and trust is almost impossible for me but i keep trying. I really frustrate my therapist sometimes she says im very challenging. You do go through abuse for 43 years and not become quite a bit challenging. I had to survive. I do not blame this on my alcoholism actually alcohol was my treatment for this for years but then i drank too hard to long and i crossed the line where alcohol didn't work any longer either. Thank you for listening.