You guys are all correct.

I know that, so I keep fighting my emotions and urges.

I likened being married to her to living beside a bakery and being gluten free.

At some point you have to quit smelling the bread.

As for unrequited love, this is it. I had other relationships before her but I ended them. Did you ever hear the saying, you don't lose if you don't stop trying?

Well, with her I never stopped trying.

Confronting this loss is very hard. I really long for unique interactions I had with her, inside jokes, whatever.

It's just hard.

I booked a counseling session next week.