I'm deteriorating while waiting my turn. I find myself questioning wether I can do it. My anxiety is not under control. My head is loud some nights. It's 4 am and I haven't slept. my t keeps finding strongly held delusions, like my fear of people. Why I chose one school over the other. And me I do nothing but ignore it, if it's too much for me to handle . Anxiety is too high. I have therapy tomorrow and I don't want to be there. I'm loosing my voice again. I know this because I have to repeat what I say to h because I'm too quiet.