Thank you for your comments . The IHT works if it's done by my parents , as opposed to me. Here the finances are quite vulnerable from what I've understood. Anyhow my father protected half his wealth , which means I'm open to attack on half, which is still a lot. That is secondary.

I just don't want my kids to go through trauma. We loved appart, and legally divorced for 3 or 4 years but the most suffering was my first ... My wife would change days, she would swap times, and then emotionally black mail me , end up taking all the public holidays etc... it was horrific. I got back because I couldn't deal with the fighting over days here and there. Now we have a second one, I can't imagine her going through the same.

To be honest , I'm having strange issues. Now when she gets annoyed , I just stay quiet and calm. But my body reacts, I start having palpitations, diarrhea, nausea .... Not sure how to manage this sometimes.