i am so close to giving up right now. i am so alone. i keep having these disturbing nightmares and i cant sleep anymore. i got sooo close to going to get help today, but when i got there i just got scared and left. all i want to do is cry. i just broke down and havent stopped crying for the past couple hours. i hate this..i hate that this is happening to me. its not fair...i feel like theres nothing to live for anymore. so why am i still here? i just dont know anything anymore...im a failure. im doing awful in school and just want to drop out. theres no point in me trying anymore...with anything, because i ALWAYS fail in the end. im sick of feeling like everything i do is wrong. blaaahhh i just want all of this to stop!!! i want my old life back. i hate feeling this way ALLLLLL the time. ok im just talking so ill stop.